Little things are the biggest

            I'll start this blog by telling you an amazing thing that happened to me recently. I received a message on facebook from a friend asking me what my address was. She said she had something that she thought I could use that she wanted to send me. I thought it might be something for Easton, I wasn't sure what to expect. Days went by and I finally got an envelope in the mail from her. I opened it and it was a gift card to Walmart, I was speechless. I could not understand why she would give us something she probably needed just as much as we did. There was a letter, it explained her reason for sending the card.
            She told me that she always reads my status's and blog posts and enjoyed them. She said she had read the post about how we had no food in the fridge and my milk would not come in, it hit home for her because she had been there before. She told me how she had to live out of her car and when she was in need someone had given this her gift card. She promised herself that she would only spend part of the money and then pay the rest forward. She told me how much I inspired her and that I should write a book. This act of kindness made me cry, I thought about it for days. I was so thankful and made sure to express that to her.
            The smallest act of kindness and change someones day, week, month, even life. Some of the smallest things in life in general, are sometimes always the biggest. I have had such a change in direction in my life since the last time I blogged. My hubby and I were having a few problems and it seemed like they would never go away. It's almost like they haunted me and I thought it was all him. I actually was able to have a heart to heart conversation with my brother and take some responsibility in why my relationship with Jared was a little off. We had a long talk and I told him the small things I was going to change and the things I would like him to work on. Everything has been wonderful ever since.
            I am a big talker so it's not like we hadn't had a million of these discussions. The problems was a minor detail, I never looked in the mirror and pointed out my flaws. I finally did and the difference is breath taking. Things haven't been this good since the first year we were together (2009). A few other small changes I have made have made my life so much better. One of them was getting my motivation back and going to the gym again. My body is looking amazing, I'm starting to get my muscle form back, and the endorphins are floating through my body like fairy dust. I am so in love with life right now.
           I decided that another small thing I needed to change was letting other people make me feel under them. It has been a recent thing that has been a problem, ever since I had my son.. I let other mothers get to me with things they say, jealous remarks, and snide comments. I am no longer paying attention to them and I just smile and know that they must be insecure, feeling under me, or have confidence issues and that's not my issue. I would not want to be anyone that I know, I have the most beautiful son, I have never seen such a beautiful baby in my life. He is perfect and not just because he is my son, he really truly is beautiful. I no longer let anything faze me, I just express my love for my family and move forward.
           I have a better vision of what I want our life to be like now. I am starting to figure out what we really need and where we need to be. It comes with experience and TIME, not just age. I have not accepted how immature, insecure, jealous, superficial, and silly people can be. The only thing that matters is if I stay true to myself, stay true to my family and whats truly important. Someone who is truly happy does not need to sarcastically voice it to the world. They proudly say it in a humble way, with class and beauty. I am proud to be one of the people who are truly happy with what they have and who they are. I have absolutely nothing to prove, I think I have already done that growing up. I have proven that no matter how hard, scary, lonely, or evil life can get I CAN MAKE IT THROUGH and come out on top every time. I am head strong, but I have a soft heart.
            The smallest things mean so much to me, they should to you also. When someone has nothing to offer you, but they give you their genuine friendship what more can you ask for. In my opinion some of the best things you can give someone are honesty, an ear, a shoulder, friendship, faith, a second chance, a hug, a smile, and sometimes even your silence. I value these simple things that make up a happy, healthy life. The smile on my face will not fade, my heart will not stop skipping beat, my son will only get cuter, my pride will never stop speaking, my beauty (inner) will NEVER fade. This is who I am, there is nothing fake about it. I am brutally honest and blunt. I am a fighter who refuses to lose. I am a mother who refuses to give anything less that the best that I have. I am a friend who refuses to give up on you. I am exactly what you see.
           I am so thankful that my depression has went away naturally and I can see these things. You never know when your last day will be. Chantal is back and better than ever, I'm climbing that ladder. I'll gladly pull you up with me, but I refuse to climb down to your level again. I'm staying high
Love Chantal Alexis Cortez

Please, stay beautiful